Dear Angel of Mine
by TrailofRoses
Summary: When Alec decides to write a letter to tell Jace how he feels...well, Jace is Alec's angel.


**Dear Angel of Mine.**

**Jace/Alec.**

Alec Lightwood sat down at his desk in the Institute. The place had become so natural at his previous sittings, usually to write little memoirs of demons, or Magnus. Although, this sitting was different. Completely different, actually. During this sitting, he was going to write a letter to a crush he'd had as long as he could remember.

He was going to write to Jace.

Yes, he would write about someone who, more than likely, would never share the same feelings. But…maybe, just maybe, Alec would be able to get over Jace easier if he wrote it down. Or if some reason, Jace had the same feelings toward Alec. By the Angel, Alec had wished that every change he received.

Alec pursed his lips as he took out a pencil from his journal. Then, turning the journal to a fresh, new page. Alec began to write.

_Dear Jace, _

No, it couldn't start out that way. Too formal for his liking, Alec crossed out the two words. Alec sat back in his black chair for a moment, putting his head on the desk in front of him, and thinking of a way to start the God-forsaken letter, Alec went into somewhat deep thought. Then the eighteen-year old sprang to life.

_Dear Jace, _

_Dear Angel of Mine, _

_Where could I even begin to express how I feel? My love's gone blind, officially. All that I feel is what I hear. So, you're sarcastic and vicious words tear through my heart, so weak and pure. Now I can find myself wishing that I could die…somewhat. _

_My heart bleeds for the second time tonight; holding all of the love that's in my mind. The only thing that could possibly make it better is if you shared your love with me. If only the pain that I'm forced to feel could die with the chances of that love being shared with me. I try and break you away from me, but it just doesn't work. _

Alec bit his bottom lip slightly, biting until his lip bled slightly. The copper-tasting, crimson substance gave him an idea. An idea that led him back to the night that he almost died, trying to kill a Greater Demon…

_As I sit here at my desk, alone. I begin to wonder if I was better of being killed by the Greater Demon that almost stole my life away from me. Then while I think about the last words you said to me, being dead doesn't sound that bad at the moment. What would you do then, Jace? If I really had died? Would you be able to go on, or would you be like me? Wishing you had died too? What would you do, Angel? _

Now the pencil's side had dug itself into Alec's hand so badly; blood had started to slowly seep out of the space between his thumb and index finger. The blood slowly dripped down the pencil's side, to the tip, then finally onto the paper. Alec's nose wrinkled slightly, but the blood only encouraged the eighteen year old teenager to write more.

_Now I'm bleeding for the third time tonight, Angel. I'm not willing to stop to draw an irataze to stop the blood coming; I'll surely lose my train of thought then. And by the Angel, I'm not willing __that __to happen. For if I let that happen, I'll lose my courage to finish writing this. _

_I really should break away from you. You'll never have the same feelings I have for you, will you? Well, that's actually the reasoning for writing this. Trying to get over you. Amazing how writing can help, isn't it? Probably the reason you hate the words so much…_

_Sincerely yours, _

_Al-_

There was a sudden, sharp knock at the door, causing Alec to jump slightly. He had been so deep into writing the brave letter, that he realized that it was just past twilight outside. Quickly covering the letter with textbooks, and opening to homework he had already finished, Alec muttered 'Come in'.

Jace entered the room quickly, frowning. Alec's breath cut short silently, as he stared at his Angel.

"Hey Alec." Jace stated.

"Hey Jace." Alec replied, mocking his tone slightly.

Jace's eyes narrowed at the other boy for a second, and Alec slightly fell into the trance…before Jace grinned, "It's time for dinner, Mayrse cooked, so I think the food should be digestible."

Alec smiled, "I'll be down in a second." Jace nodded before walking out, shutting the door behind him. Alec quickly shoved the books off of his journal, staring at the letter. Could he tell Jace?

Alec shook his head slightly, before tearing out the page, and then burning it. As Alec walked out of his room to join his family for dinner, he hadn't noticed the ashes of the letter.

The only remains were of the title Alec had written…

Dear Angel of Mine…


End file.
